Surrounding is a key factor in everyone. In my surrounding everywhere marriage is going on.
When it comes to my marriage, I'm afraid of marriage and started thinking about lots of things.
I'm very much clear about my choices and my family choices but still, I'm in dilemma to get marry and
make a new family.
I did some research for that.
I found some answers from my heart and some from observing my family & friends and some from media.
I asked myself some questions so many times- what is marriage, what is good for me,
love marriage or arrange marriage and how I know I got the right person, etc?
Different people define it in different ways. Not even sociologists are able to agree on a single meaning.
According to me, love is God gifted, it's doesn't matter you got love marriage or arrange marriage,
in every marriage life love is essential. It does not matter, you love someone
before or after marriage, the fact is how much you love him/her, how much you sharing and caring.
Marriage and family are key structures in most societies.
I am going to share some of the important things to make a healthy marriage -
John Gottman, one of the nation's foremost researchers of marriages and families, says that "trust is essential to healthy relationships and healthy communities."
If you have strong trust then your relationship is healthy nothing will harm your relationship.
Sometimes you do what you like, and other times you do...what the other person likes.
Maybe people will understand this is a compromise but it's actually the color of love.
You spend time together doing things you both enjoy.
Whether that's hiking, food tasting, watching movies or listening to any song, or even working together.
If one spouse is passionate about writing and reading then the other person should make time to read and give some tips to improve.
Sometimes, giving space for each other is necessary.
It is a boring life to spend 24 / 7 together and can't have separate interests and hobbies.
you both understand, and respect, that you need time apart doing what you want to do.
4. Attentiveness for each other
Even if u get the best chance for going somewhere or your favorite movie ticket,
if your partner is not feeling well or he/she has some important work to do then
understanding each other's situation is the best part of your relationship.
Sharing small things also gives more pleasure.
If your situation is bad, don't hide it,
since they will be there to comfort you and help you figure out ways to move on from this bad situation.
6. Change Overnight
Don't expect each other to change overnight.
If your spouse is fat or thin or any bad habits they have then that won't make you feel ashamed or even expect you to change overnight.
Make them understand that change is a process, and I will support you along the way.
7. Do Fights
Do some productive fights with him/her.
This means listening to each other, understanding and respecting each other's viewpoints,
and finding common ground so that you can strengthen your marriage.
8. Value and Goals
Share each other's values and goals.
I think it would be boring if a couple had the exact interests or personalities.
so respect each other's interest and personality.
Don't expect the same personality as yours.
Let your spouse know how much you are proud of him/her. Celebrate his/her small
9. Helping each other
Help each other to become more successful and to maintain a productive work-life balance. I saw in my family, a spouse is also your biggest strength in helping you achieve your goals and will do whatever they can, to help you overcome obstacles blocking your path to success in work and life. And they're genuinely excited when you succeed.
“Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.” – Mark Twain.
Make your marriage fun and happy. Tell some words which make your spouse cheer up.
When life is stressful this the best way to cheer up.
Listen to him/her rather talking more (vise versa).
Your spouse needs the gift of your time and attention.
When you listen generously, your spouse will feel secure in coming to you with their concerns, hopes, and fears.
Once you’ve identified what your spouse is feeling—whether it’s anger, sadness, frustration,
anxiety, or excitement—you can adjust your responses based on their emotional state.
When our emotions go into a tailspin, it can be difficult to keep communication healthy.
One way to build intimacy in your relationship is by sharing your thoughts and feelings
with each other and then responding to those disclosures in a way that makes you both feel good.
Seek knowledge from each other.
You may don't have the same knowledge.
The right person is someone who is interested in learning and growing intellectually by constantly seeking knowledge.
13. Ask for help
Never hesitate to ask for help.
Asking for help is not your weakness.
When you ask your spouse for advice or help you're respecting and admitting the fact that they have more experience or skills in an area that you're not that familiar with.
You share the same financial goals.
Even the greatest of relationship can end in a break up due to financial differences and concerns.
You should both be on the same page when it comes to your financial goals, such as how much money
you need to live a happy and stress-free life and how you're going to save for retirement.
Strong couples create and share budgets, as well as generate financial challenges for themselves
in order to put their finances in order.
The ways in which we can express physical affection vary and more research is needed.
Physical affection is related to lower blood pressure & releases feel-good hormones.
One of the reasons why hugging, holding hands, and touching feel good to us is that these behaviors elevate our level of oxytocin, a hormone that reduces pain and causes a calming sensation.
How important is physical intimacy in a relationship and what does it really mean?
It’s an expression of love.
Being physically intimate means more than simply heading to the bedroom with your spouse.
Physical intimacy can range from eye-contact, holding hands, cuddling, and of course, sex.
Physical intimacy involves a deep emotional connection.
Having a deep connection to your spouse on this level helps build trust, boosts morale, and has many health benefits.