“Marriages and romances, that looks beautiful in stories, have been a painful affair for many in real life as many Indian brides have to go through and adjust with a sacred agreement laying down different ways to torture a daughter-in law.”
In simple words, this act lays down the clever ways to torture/control a daughter-in-law.
Something against which you cannot file a case as there is no court in India that will address vulgar harassment done to daughter-in-law under the veil of laughter; monetary and emotional losses incurred on the account of rumours & harassment done using humour to abuse the girl.
“Laughter is the best way to harass a daughter-in-law; the great part is that you can sexually harass a girl by using wit. The sweetest/ tragic part of the story is that she cannot fight a legal case against her in-laws/ husband; if they are using wit/ humour to mock her or harass her or dominate her or to make her feel inferior on emotional and financial fronts.”
Amidst these social tensions, I saw an interesting video in which a guy is marrying a hologram, giving rise to romance in virtual world as his relations with women in real life were painful.
His name is Dan Ini Akihiko who married Hatsune Miku, a hologram. Miku is a simple form of artificial intelligence; pretty doll like image projection that have a beautiful voice; performs at concerts as a 3-D projection. Akihiko created Miku to have virtual romance and share some interesting conversations as his real life relations with women were painful.
I came across this piece of information while doing my research on Artificial Intelligence, this linked me back to my poem “Indian Men Should Marry Alexa”, that I have written a year ago.” I was always of an opinion that Indian Men Should Marry Alexa/ Robots, after seeing the amazing non-verbal ways, that can’t be proved in court, which in-laws and husbands in Indian society use to torture their daughter-in-law.
As per the “Daughter-In-Law Harassment Act, 18xx”, which is a sacred non-verbal agreement between the mother and the son to mentally torture their daughter-in-law and that too by making fun of her. In laughter, you will get to know that you are being harassed /tortured while you won’t be able to file a case against them.
“Laughter is the best way to harass a daughter-in-law. You can easily be vulgar with your daughter-in-law or the new bride in the home and hide it under the veil of laughter.”
The good part for the in-laws is that it can’t be proved in any court; these insults are covered under the veil of humour which is the sweetest way to sexually abuse and kill a daughter-in-law emotionally and mentally. They are alive but are not able to live; the death can’t be proved in any court as it is not real death, it is the death of a person on emotional and mental front. Death of her dreams, death of her self-confidence and death of her choice to have her own life.
Insulting daughter-in-law is a common affair in Indian society. It starts from the very first day of the wedding; when she eats her first dinner with her husband and new family. There she learns that she will be exposed to vulgar comments for all her life and she has to manage with it.
After marriage vulgarity gets normal affair; get-togethers and office parties wherever she will go the vulgar relatives & friends of her husband will follow her.
This indirect harassment; comes out to be a pain in long run which she ignored in the very beginning of the marriage. This slowly leads to her low confidence levels, increased stress levels, unnecessary arguments, poor relationships, slavery, sadness, depression and a time comes wherein she start feeling less than others or give herself to mediocrity leaving behind the dreams that she had for her life.
The amazing part is that this sort of ‘Haaa Haaa Haaa way of Sexual & Mental Harassment’ can’t be reported under ‘Indian Law’. There is not even any NGO that will address this issue; because it is not an issue till now in our country. Even if women feel bad about such vulgar comments given in family gatherings; nobody bothers to express themselves. As they live their lives being speechless since the Indian civilisation has came into existence.’
Women often feel sad because of this ‘Haaa Haaa Haaa way of Sexual & Mental Harassment’, one which is done using laughter.’ Usually, a girl resigns to this treatment accepting it to be a part of her married life and suppress the fact that she feels bad, suffocated and frustrated when she is insulted in this way for a long time, a feeling that starts seriously bothering women after the initial 6 or 7 years of married life have passed away; that is the point when she feels depressed about the lack of love in her married life & the humorous insults have now taken a bitter form and are no longer of ‘Haa Haa nature’.
Now, she has a child, she has no career as she left her job ages back and she is lazy enough to fight back. She resigns to live with the insults in her home with her unloving husband and in-laws as there is no easy way she can find to save herself from the rules of “Daughter-In-Law Harassment Act, 18xx” & her own lack of will to change her circumstances as it will demand hard work on emotional, mental and physical front. This is an ordinary case, where Indian women resign to slavery and unjust behaviour on part of in-laws, relatives, neighbours and her husband.
However, there could be another case wherein a girl, decides to leave her husband in a year of marriage as she do not want to tolerate this ‘Haaa Haaa Haaa way of Sexual & Mental Harassment’. Because she knows that her husband cannot stop his parents, relatives and friends from insulting her. At the same time, he won’t leave his family for her.
Thus, the girl moves away with a heart full of love, a bag full of books, her favourite dresses, chocolates, yum grilled cheese sandwich and an air ticket to explore a new place leaving a legal notice for her husband who didn’t respected her love. A happy divorce, wherein she knows that love in her heart, will help her to sail smoothly in the sea of the real difficulties that she will land into after the divorce.
Unlike Dan Ini Akihiko, she kept her love for life in her heart, so that she does not feel the need to fall in love with Miku: a romance in Virtual Reality. She felt the importance of being a human; the difference between a robot and a human is emotions. In the era heading towards Artificial Intelligence (AI), she kept the love for life in her heart.
Her simple act of her happy divorce and leaving her in-laws home with a heart full of love, a bag full of books, her favourite dresses, chocolates, yum grilled cheese sandwich and an air ticket to explore a new place leaving a legal notice for her husband who didn’t respected her love was a simple way she thought to move out from the age-old ritual of adjusting to the “Daughter-In-Law Harassment Act, 18xx”, creating an example for many other daughter-in-laws to leave their unhappy marriages with a heart full of love, a bag full of books, her favourite dresses, chocolates, yum grilled cheese sandwich and an air ticket to explore a new place and a legal notice to the husband who didn’t respected her love.
This attitude is the best way to deal with the “Daughter-In-Law Harassment Act, 18xx”, which lays the foundation for harassing women in the name of marriage, without begging in front of Indian Judiciary; wherein the cases of women suppression are already piled up. There is no one to address the concern.
It would be better that she herself find a solution instead of finding romance in Virtual Reality. She found a solution by finding love in her heart; with a mind that have dreams for her new tomorrow and a body that can work hard to make those dreams real.
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Indian Men Should Marry Alexa