પૂજ્ય ગાંધીબાપુને પત્ર.૨૦૧૮પૂજ્ય બાપુસાદર પ્રણામ. હા જન્મ ગુલામ ભારતમાં થયો હતો. કદાપી ગુલામી ભોગવી ન હતી. ખૂબ સારા સંસ્કાર પામી ઉછરી છું. માંડ ત્રણ વર્ષની હતી ત્યાં તમે વિદાય લીધી. બસ, ત્યારથી બાપુ તમારી ચાહક અને પૂજારી છું. અરે, બાપુ તમે તો શું ગયા, ભારતને ભૂલી જ ગયા! માન્યું કે ગોડસેની ગોળીથી વિંધાયા, પણ તમે તો ઉદાર છો. સહુના ભૂલની માફી આપો છે. મને ખબર છે તમારા દિલમાં ગોડસે માટે કોઈ ખોટો વિચાર નથી. તમે તેને પણ ખુલ્લા દિલે પ્રેમ કરો છો. તમારો સ્વભાવ, તમારી મુત્સદ્દીગીરી દાદ માગી લે તેવા છે. હમેશા બોખલા મુખનું તમારું નિર્મળ હાસ્ય હૈયાને સ્પર્શ્યું છે. ભારત આઝાદ થયું ,ત્યારની તમારી તીવ્ર વેદના અસહ્ય હતી. આજે તો તેનાથી પણ બદતર હાલત છે.હેં બાપુ, કેમ આપણા ભારત દેશની પ્રજા આટલા બધા નીચા સ્તરે ઉતરી ગઈ છે. આપણા કેટલા દેશ્પ્રેમીઓએ જાન આપ્યા? કેટલી સ્ત્રીઓના સોહાગ ઉજડ્યા? કેટલા કુટુંબોના એકના એક દીકરાઓએ બલિદાન આપ્યા.? સ્ત્રીઓએ પણ આઝાદીની લડતમાં પોતાનો ફાળો નોંધાવ્યો છે. બાપુ આઝાદીની ઘણી મોટી કિંમત આપણે ચૂકવી હતી.બાપુ આજે તમારી પુણ્યતિથિને દિવસે લોકો ભેગા થશે, તમને અંજલિ આપશે. તમારા ખૂબ મનગમતાં ભજન ,’રઘુપતિ રાઘવ રાજા રામ, પતિત પાવન સિતારામ અને વૈષ્ણવ જન તો તેને કહીએ જે પીડ પરાઈ જાણે રે ગાશે’. બસ તમારી યાદ ખતમ. હજુ તો પ્રાર્થના સભાની બહાર નહી ગયા હોય ત્યાં દિમાગ કાવાદાવામાં મગ્ન. બાપુ, તમે હવે માત્ર યાદ કરવા માટે, તમારી ગાથા ગાવા પૂરતાં ભારતમાં વસો છો. તમારા ફોટા બધે છપાય છે.બાપુ એક વાત કહું , વર્ષો પછી ભારત દેશને વફાદાર વડાપ્રધાન મળ્યા છે. જેમને ભારત માતા પ્રત્યે અનહદ પ્રેમ છે. શ્રી નરેન્દ્ર મોદી. બાપુ તેમની વાણી, આચરણ અને કાર્ય દેશભક્તિથી ઉભરાય છે. પણ આપણી પ્રજા તેમને સહયોગ આપવાને બદલે તેમના ટાંટિયા ખેંચવામાં મશગુલ છે. તેઓ માનવી છે. કિંતુ તેમની ભાવના અને કર્તવ્ય તેમને ,”મુઠ્ઠી ઉંચેરા માનવી” બનાવે છે.આ રાહુલ અને સોનિયા ભારતના ઈતિહાસમાં કલંક રૂપ છે. બાપુ જવાહરલાલને વડાપ્રધાન બનાવી દેશની બેહાલી કરી હતી. આજે પણ આપણો દેશ તેની સજા ભોગવી રહ્યો છે.ભ્રષ્ટાચાર , લાંચરૂશ્વત આપણી પ્રજામાં પ્રાણવાયુની જેમ ફેલાયા છે. જેના વગર જીવનનું અસ્તિત્વ નથી ! બાપુ શું કહું અને શું લખું. આ જીવને ઉચાટ શમતો નથી. બાપુ જ્યારે જુવાની હતી ત્યારે બાળકોની જવાબદારી હતી. આજે દેશ માટે કરી છૂટવાની દાઝ છે ત્યારે ઘડપણને ઉંબરે આવીને ઉભી છું.માત્ર કલમ દ્વારા કાર્ય જારી રાખ્યું છે. દેશની ધરતી માટે પ્યાર ,દેશવાસીઓ માટે સનમાન છલોછલ ભર્યા છે. ભારત જવાની કોઈ પણ તક ચૂક્તી નથી. આજે આપની પુણ્ય તિથિને દિવસે હૈયુ ઠાલવ્યું. તમારાથી અધિક ભારતને કોણે ચાહ્યું છે ?બાપુ, આશા રાખું છું આ પત્ર તમે વાંચો કે ન વાંચો આપણી દેશવાસીઓ વાચશે અને જો તેમનામાં રામ વસે તો ???????????????બાપુ લાખ લાખ વંદન
The first question people have when someone tells them they are studying psychology is, ‘can you tell what I’m thinking?’ The answer to that question is no because psychologists are not mentalists. Nor can they ever be. Psychology is the science of understanding the how’s and why’s. How they think, how they work, how they behave and most importantly, WHY they think, WHY they work and WHY they behave as they do. Human species is a complexity at best. We are paradoxical beings. Saying something and doing something entirely different. Psychology helps us bridge the gap between the saying and doing. Moreover, after you study the subject, get a look at the theories that have been proposed, you start applying it to the situations around you. You start understanding the reasons behind the sly smiles and the meaningful looks. You begin to understand that every person in this world has a reason and a past. The reason for their behavior and their past which has shaped them into the person that they have become. It gives you a brilliant glimpse of life through the other person’s eyes. You become more empathetic, instead of sympathizing, you connect with another soul on a level so as to understand them better. You become more open and loving because you understand that every person in this world is fighting their own battles so you want to do everything to help. That’s the good part. Now, the paradox. You can never truly be pissed off at someone. You can never truly be angry because you will be bound to rationalize their actions and invariably find a logical theory to support their behavior. This may seem like ideal behavior in print but not being angry or not taking out your anger is as dangerous as the next viral outbreak. It rots you from inside until you become a chamber of nothingness.So you see, herein lies the problem. Psychology is a field of tremendous irony and in this irony, we, as humans can only hope to not get lost because it makes us better humans for one yet vials of emptiness for others.
इस आधुनिक दौर मे बच्चों का सही तरीके से पालन पोषण करना बहुत कठिन कार्य हो गया है।एक ओऱ बच्चोंमें अच्छे संस्कार देना जरूरी है तो दूसरी ओऱ उन्हें अनुशासित रखना और उनके दोस्त बने रहना भी बहुत जरूरी है। आजकल बड़ों के पाँव छुना , पूजा करना ,ये बचपन मे बच्चे फिर भी सुन लेते हैं ,पर बड़े होने के बाद पुराने ज़माने की सोच कह कर टाल देते हैं। रही सही कसर आजकल इन्टरनेट ने पूरी कर दी है ,जहाँ ये ज्ञान का भंडार है वहीँ बच्चों को बिगाड़ने का सबसे बड़ा साधन ,इसमे गेम्स ,फेसबुक और भी बहुत कुछ है। एक ओर बच्चों के विकास के लिए कंप्यूटर जरूरी है तो वहीँ इन सबसे उन्हें बचाना मुश्किल। मोबाइल फ़ोन एक दुसरी चिंता का विषय बन गया है ,ये भी समय पर देना जरूरी है क्युकी टूशन और एक्स्ट्रा एक्टिविटी के लिए वो सारे दिन बाहर रहते हैं। पर इसके दुष्परिणाम भी बहुत हैं। बच्चे सारा सारा दिन उसी मे लगे रहते हैं ,सार ये है की हमे सब देना भी है और उन्हें उनके दुष्परिणाम से जागरूक भी रखना है ,जोकि सबसे बड़ी चुनौती है। मुश्किल अभी यहीं नहीं खत्म होती ,बच्चों की ज़िद जो तक़रीबन हर माँ बाप की सबसे बड़ी मुसीबत है ,जो आजकल देखा -देखी हर दूसरी चीज़ के लिए होती है, जिसे पूरा करना मुश्किल है और समझाना उससे भी बड़ी मुसीबत ,हम माँ बाप की भी बहुत जगह गलती होती है ,हम बच्चे को हर छेत्र मे अव्वल देखना चाहते हैं ,पढाई खेलखुद और न जाने क्या-क्या और उनपर इसके लिए प्रेशर डालते हैं । "कुल मिला कर हर चीज़ मे एक बैलेंस होना बहुत जरूरी है , तभी हम उन्हें देश का एक अच्छा और सच्चा नागरिक बना पाएंगे"। रेवा
"You are too sensitive!"The countless times of this review made me to analyze, synthesize and redefine my personality.High sensitivity is a misunderstood trait. As a highly sensitive person (HSP) myself, I’ve felt insecure in the past about my empathic, thoughtful nature. Luckily, society’s perception of sensitivity is changing, thanks in part to the growing acceptanceneuro-diversity—the idea that neurological variation among people is normal.When you think of the most successful person you know, what qualities do they embody? It’s likely you’re wowed by their ingenuity and creative problem-solving skills. Or maybe you’re impressed by their emotional intelligence and ninja-like ability to connect with people.These are just a few qualities of highly sensitive people (or HSPs), who make up about 20 percent of the population. Despite popular belief, sensitive people make great leaders. They’re consistently rated as top performers. HSPs tend to be well-liked by managers and appreciated for their commitment, even if they get on their co-worker’s nerves from time to time.Some of this diverse group of “famous” individuals that — in my opinion — might appropriately belong on the list of those who exhibit the characteristics of high sensitivity would include Scientists: Albert Einstein, Carl Jung and Charles Darwin, Sir Isaac Newton, Thomas Alva Edison to political leaders: Abraham Lincoln, Harry S. Truman, Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcolm X, Gandhi, Dalai Lama, Mother Teresa, Eleanor Roosevelt and Princess Diana, today’s celebrities: Mandy Moore, Adrien Brody, Glenn Close, Eddie Murphy, Joaquin Phoenix, Nicole Kidman, Kevin Kline, Winona Ryder and Elijah Wood, to name a few Artists: Leonardo da Vinci, Vincent Van Gogh, Salvador Dali, Georgia O’Keefe, Picasso, Frida Kahlo and Frank Lloyd Wright, Bob Dylan, John Lennon, Elton John, Alanis Morissette, Neil Young, Jim Morrison.Singer/song writer Jewel in her famous “I’m Sensitive” song, sings: “So please be careful with me, I’m sensitive And I’d like to stay that way. I have this theory, that if we’re told we’re bad Then that’s the only idea we’ll ever have…”Being sensitive is a superpower, but if not managed properly, it can turn into a stumbling block. Navigating the world as a highly sensitive person involves special considerations, as does loving, working, or living with an HSP.1: The Secret Life of a Highly Sensitive Person And why the trait can actually be an advantage: Applying Your Highly Sensitive Strengths HSPs are masters of emotional intelligence. They pick up on subtleties that less sensitive people miss and have a keen ability to read between the lines. Believe it or not, HSPs can be great entrepreneurs and marketers precisely because they tend to be so skilled at building rapport, listening, and empathizing.2. HSPs are conscientious: Details, structure, and organization are their jam. Because they are accustomed to processing a lot of input, they easily come up with plans and solutions for complex problems, which is an invaluable asset. HSPs can also concentrate deeply and adore getting lost in ideas. This make us perfectly positioned for success in an era where deep work matters.3. HSPs are innovative.Some of the world’s best artists include HSPs. Why? Pair heightened sensory processing with a rich inner experience and you have a group of people neurologically wired to create. So, lean into your curiosity, ask questions that rock the status quo, and explore your whims. It’s what separates you from others who are too afraid to think big.4. HSPs are multi-passionate.They care about their work, their relationships, and it shows. HSPs are usually intelligent trailblazers who find ways to uniquely combine their varied interests into satisfying careers that have impact on the world.Thriving as a Sensitive Person Are there downsides to possessing this innate trait? Of course. But with some forethought and intention, they can employ their high sensitivity as their greatest strength. Get more comfortable with feedback. Most highly sensitive people, despite being good communicators, don’t fare well when caught off guard in meetings or presentations. Similarly, one critical comment may shake them for days or weeks. If you’re an HSP, get ready for high-stakes interactions by anticipating questions that may arise. 5. Don’t react—respond.Life doesn’t always go according to script, and as an HSP, you need to hone your resilience skills in response to surprises. To curb panic and emotional flooding, practice putting space between the triggering event and your response to it.6. Be bullish with boundaries.As a highly sensitive person, it’s essential to conserve your energy. You spend the day picking up on the feelings and moods of your peers. If these interactions skew negative, they can leave you feeling drained. Noisy, busy environments (even bad music—yes, seriously) also take a toll on HSPs.Simple shifts can make a big difference. Try getting to the office early so you can have some quiet working time before the hustle and bustle of the day takes holds. I put a 15-to-30-minute buffer between all meetings to ensure I have time to decompress.Managing your energy effectively comes down to creating solid boundaries and paying close attention to the inputs you allow into your life. Limit time with toxic people, be careful about the media you consume, and be bullish about self-care. If you demand a lot from yourself (which most HSPs do), then building in periods for rest and recovery is nonnegotiable.Tips for Loving or Working with an HSP: Highly sensitive people make loyal partners and great leaders, that much we know. But truthfully, loving, living with, or working alongside an HSP isn’t always easy. You can’t (and shouldn’t try) to change them. But you can inspire and support them in simple ways:If you work with an HSP:Keep them in the loop with frequent updates and clear information. HSPs tend to have a high input orientation, so the more they know, the better.When possible, let them prepare. Give them the meeting agenda ahead of time.Focus on coaching instead of criticizing. Details are an HSP strength, so provide ultraspecific steps for improvement.Honor their hunches. Value intuition as part of your HSP’s decision-making process.2. If you love an HSP:Build quiet time and solitude into your shared schedule.Expect insomnia. HSPs sometimes struggle to sleep soundly because they have active minds.Be patient with them during confrontation. If they need space, don’t take it personally.Above all, whether you’re a co-worker, a sibling, or a spouse, try to appreciate the unique set of characteristics an HSP possesses as best you can. There can be a sharp learning curve, but ultimately, you will both see how high sensitivity can shape your worlds for the better.
मैंने मन बना लिया है कि अपने जीवन की सबसे बड़ी, अमूल्य और प्रिय पूंजी अपनी किताबों को अपने घर से विदा कर दूं। वे जहां भी जायें, नये पाठकों के बीच प्यार का, ज्ञान का और अनुभव का खजाना उसी तरह से खुले हाथों बांटती चलें जिस तरह से वे मुझे और मेरे बच्चों को बरसों से समृद्ध करती रही हैं। उन किताबों ने मेरे घर पर अपना काम पूरा कर लिया है बेशक ये कचोट रहेगी कि दोबारा मन होने पर उन्हें नहीं पढ़ पाऊंगा लेकिन ये तसल्ली भी है कि उनकी जगह पर नयी किताबों का भी नम्बर आ पायेगा जो पढ़े जाने की कब से राह तक रही हैं। लाखों रुपये की कीमत दे कर कहां कहां से जुटायी, लायी, मंगायी और एकाध बार चुरायी गयी मेरी लगभग 4000 किताबों में से हरेक के साथ अलग कहानी जुड़ी हुई है। अब सब मेरी स्मृंतियों का हिस्सा बन जायेंगी। कहानी, उपन्यास, जीवनियां, आत्मकथाएं, बच्चों की किताबें, अमूल्य शब्द कोष, एनसाइक्लोपीडिया, भेंट में मिली किताबें, यूं ही आ गयी किताबें, ‍रेफरेंस बुक्स सब कुछ तो है इनमें।ये किताबें पुस्तकालयों, वाचनालयों, जरूरतमंद विद्यार्थियों, घनघोर पाठकों और पुस्‍तक प्रेमियों तक पहुंचें, ऐसी मेरी कामना है। 24 और 25 दिसम्बर 2011 को दिन में मुंबई और आस पास के मित्र मेरे घर एच 1/101 रिद्धि गार्डन, फिल्मि सिटी रोड, मालाड पूर्व आ कर अपनी पसंद की किताबें चुन सकते हैं। बाहर के पुस्तकालयों, वाचनालयों, जरूरतमंद विद्यार्थियों, घनघोर पाठकों और पुस्तक प्रेमियों को किताबें मंगाने की व्यवस्था खुद करनी होगी या डाक खर्च वहन करना होगा।मेरे प्रिय कथाकार रवीन्द्र कालिया जी ने एक बार कहा था कि अच्छी किताबें पतुरिया की तरह होती है जो अपने घर का रास्ता भूल जाती हैं और एक पाठक से दूसरे पाठक के घर भटकती फिरती हैं और खराब किताबें आपके घर के कोने में सजी संवरी अपने पहले पाठक के इंतजार में ही दम तोड़ देती हैं।कामना है कि मेरी किताबें पतुरिया की तरह खूब लम्बा जीवन और खूब सारे पाठक पायें।आमीन
How physical appearance helps you to boost your confidence.
Human Psychology================ମଣିଷର ମନ ଅଦ୍ଭୁତ। ଏବେ ଏଇଠି ତ କ୍ଷଣକ ମଧ୍ୟରେ ଚନ୍ଦ୍ର କିମ୍ବା ମଙ୍ଗଳରେ ପହଞ୍ଚି ଯିବ। ମନ ଠାରୁ ଚଞ୍ଚଳ ଗତି ଆଉ କାହାରି ବି ନାହିଁ। ମନ ଯେତେବେଳେ ଯାହା ଚାହେଁ ତାହା ଚିନ୍ତା କରିପାରେ। ହୁଏତ ତାର ଚିନ୍ତନରେ ଥିବା ବିଷୟ ହାସଲ କରିବା ସମ୍ପୂର୍ଣ୍ଣ ରୁପେ ଅସମ୍ଭବ ହୋଇଥାଉ ହେଲେ ସେ ବିଷୟରେ ଭାବିବାକୁ ତାକୁ କେହି ଅଟକାଇ ପାରିବେନାହିଁ। ଶିଶୁଟିଏ ଜନ୍ମ ହେଲାପରେ ସମୟ କ୍ରମେ ତାର ଶାରୀରିକ ଅଭିବୃଦ୍ଧି ଘଟିଥାଏ ଓ ତା ସହିତ ତାର ମାନସିକ ସ୍ଥିତିର ମଧ୍ୟ କ୍ରମଶଃ ପରିବର୍ତ୍ତନ ଘଟିଥାଏ। ଶୈଶବ ଅବସ୍ଥାରେ ଗୋଟିଏ ଶିଶୁର ଇଚ୍ଛା ଯାହା ଥାଏ ତାହା ତାର ବୃଦ୍ଧାବସ୍ଥାରେ ପରିଲିକ୍ଷିତ ହୋଇ ନଥାଏ। ଚାଲନ୍ତୁ ଦେଖିବା ଶୈଶବ ଓ ବୃଦ୍ଧାବସ୍ଥାରେ ମଣିଷର ମନୋସ୍ଥିତିକୁ ନେଇ ରଚିତ ଏହି କବିତା କେତେ ଦୂର ସତ୍ୟ ।ବିଚିତ୍ର ଏ ମନ ମୋର============ଯେତେବେଳେ ଛୋଟ ପିଲା ଥିଲି,"ପାପା ମାମା" ଏଇ କେତୋଟି ଶବ୍ଦ ମୁଁ ଖନେଇ ଖନେଇ କହୁଥିଲି ॥୧॥ମନ ମୋର ଯାହା କରୁଥିଲି,ଖେଳଣା କଣ୍ଢେଇ ଆସୁଥିଲା ଯେତେସବୁ ଭାଙ୍ଗି ମଜ୍ଜା ନେଉଥିଲି ॥୨॥ନିଜକୁ ମୁଁ ବଡ ଭାବୁଥିଲି,ପାପାଙ୍କର ଯୋତା ଚପଲ ପିନ୍ଧିକିଘର ଅଗଣାରେ ଚାଲୁଥିଲି॥୩॥ଗାଲୁ ଗାଲୁ କରି ଗପୁଥିଲି,ଜେଜେ,ଜେଜେମା ଖୁସି ହେଉଥିଲେପରିବାର ମନ ମୋହୁଥିଲି॥୪॥ବୟସ ମୋ ଚାଲିଥିଲା ବଢି,ସ୍କୁଲ୍ ରେ ମୋର ନାମ ଲେଖିଦେଲେବାହାରିଲି ମୁଁ ପାଠ ପଢି॥୫॥ଯୁବା ବୟସ ମୋ ଆସିଗଲା,ପାଠପଢା ସାରି ବାହା ସାହା ହେଲିସଂସାରୀ ଜୀବନ ଚାଲୁ ହେଲା ॥୬॥ସମୟ ଚାଲିଲାି ଗଡି ଗଡି,ପଡି ଉଠି ଧାଇଁ ବୃଦ୍ଧ ମୁଁ ହେଲିଣିହାତରେ ମୋ ଆଜି ଆଶାବାଡି ॥୭॥ମନ ଖୋଜେ ଆଜି ପିଲାବେଳ,ପିଲାବେଳେ ଶୀଘ୍ର ବଡ ହେବା ପାଇଁଏଇ ମନ ଥିଲା କି ଚଞ୍ଚଳ ॥୮॥ବଡ ବିଚିତ୍ର ଏ ମନ ମୋର,ଯେତେବେଳେ ଯାହା ଚାହିଁଲେ କିଏସେପୂରଣ କରିବ ଇଚ୍ଛା ତାର ॥୯॥*******#smblogcontest
**Based on a true incident**If you have ever been to Dadar Station ( Mumbai ), you already know how crowded it gets at times and after a second of a train's arrival people start to board and deboard it like a flock of sheep.It was a pretty hostile day and in my misfortune, I couldn't get a place to stand properly, let alone a place to sit.As I settled down, I found myself standing behind a girl. She was a girl with a gloomy facial feature - winged eyeliner, a white fitted top and a grey bag and she seemed to have overused perfume.We were like two strangers heading towards different destinations like I and others were but then came a guy who was in his mid-twenties stood beside me.A havoc seemed to have created, first he unsettled us by searching something in his bag, then he almost pushed an old man just to take the cell out of his pocket.After a while he started to stare at me - he was staring at me in the way I stare at people if they criticize the food I like - the fire in my eyes can burn cities.It made me sheer uncomfortable being stared at with hatred and that too by a stranger can make anyone that way. I thought to initiate a conversation. I dropped the Idea.I should not have because in the other moment, he held me by my collar and said his first words to me, " Madarchod , tm iss larki ke sath kya kar rahe ho ?".I was dazzled. I had no clue what made him so angry that he didn't hesitate to curse my mother but that had made me no less angry.I shrugged his hand rapidly and that made him move backward in his place. The girl in front of me was dazed." Tumhe bilkul sharam nahi , tum iss larki ke sath train mei badtameezi kar rahe ho ,Aap daro mat ma'am , hum apke sath hai ".He said to the girl." Excuse me ? " Was the girl's reply." Main ne kuch nahi kia , mujhe piche se push kia ja raha tha." I blurted at him.The other two men and a woman popped in and straightaway asked the girl, " Kya isne kuch badtameezi ki tumhare sath" ? She looked at me exasperated and said," Inhe sirf piche se push kia ja raha tha , ulta yeh physical contact avoid kar rahe tah."I took a sigh of relief.She spoke further, " Woh insaan sirf hero banne ki kosis kar raha hai ".It was enough for them to trust her and they all told him to apologize.To my surprise, he had something else to say." Esi larkiya tight kapre pehen k aati hai , inhe insab cheezo se koi problem bhi nahi."Before I could punch his face, the train stopped and he disappeared into the crowd.If I will ever meet that girl again, I will thank her once again, more than I had thanked her for that time and more than thanking her, I would cajole her as she was upset with the man's words.I don't know if it was the incident or the girl, but I started to respect girls a little more after that.
Negative Phase: A phase where we keep disturbed, angry and annoyed all the time from the person who left. We keep abusing, cursing that person in alone, almost everytime. We cry but do not get peace even after weeping. The mind doesn't get settled anywhere. Bad thoughts overcome our senses. Even friends and family seems enemy, we start hating love and relationships.This phase needs patience.Neutral Phase: We stop abusing and cursing the Ex and start remembering him/her in alone. Tears start to come out at every moment we remember. As tears fall down, it gives relief to the heart. It happens only when we are alone because in this phase we start liking being with friends and family. Studies and work keep us busy. We start feeling annoyed from the loneliness and need a partner so that we can enjoy.This phase needs acceleration and determination.Growing Phase: When we step up and decide that now it is not gonna work like before. Once again we start going around with people to make a relationship as phase 1 and phase 2 teach us a lot of lessons. We start shaking head on the moments that we wasted with our Ex, and moments happened during the day bring a smile on our lips. By reaching this phase we understand one important thing that" Always a start is needed to get out of the bad phases and no phase is permanent in life. " Once we understand this statement, means we are fully Healed.
2:50 amThe world is planning to have a good night and here I am fighting my internal demons.Playing my favorite track to distract myself, otherwise, I will give up again. I could feel those things coming back to me, those wounds which were never healed and probably could never be.I am different they say, I can't make eye contact with people and often fail in building a conversation with them and for this they bully me but my Mossi says that I am no different and I ask myself then why I always stay alone and no one comes to me.I gave up on everything no motivation to do anything. As soon as I close my eyes all I could see is my whole life moving in front of my eyes like a movie.People say you don't try to fight for yourself, but they don't actually know what it feels like to be defeated every time you stand for yourself. They don't know about the nights I stay awake just to calm myself down, they don't know about the nights I puke just because taking medicines for my anxiety is not my cup of tea.My lips had frozen and my hands had shivered when I had tried to gulp down the sleeping pills and poison.After crying for hours about my miserable life I often dial computerized voice number when I need to cry and speak my heart out.Today, as I empty the sleeping pills and bottle of poison, my lips don't freeze, my hands don't shiver and I finally know I am not going to be like this for the rest of my life.But wait, who cares? No one right? Everyone loves to advise you for free but no has the courage to stand by your side and say I am there for you no matter how worse your condition.
Hi, I am an introvert and afraid to communicate with people but human as well and I also had a crush on one of my classmates during my college days.But it wasn't possible for me to talk to her directly, so I approached one of her friends and my schoolmate and that's when everything changed. Days passed as I started texting the friend regularly, keeping my crush aside. In college, we were in different sections but we used to meet after every class. Everybody in the class assumed that I was dating her but we were just good friends. Soon I was sharing everything about my life with her and intended to know more about her. In no time she was my best friend. Being an introvert and having a girl as a Best friend is surprising but she was special to me. For the first time, I was that close to a girl.Two years passed in a blink of an eye. You see time passes quickly when good things happen. Now we are people who know each other completely and understood each other's action. She changed me for good. But life is full of surprises and I had no idea what's coming next.Our friendship went great for let's say two and a half years until I had to shift to a different state for higher studies. That is when everything changed for us. It was getting tougher day by day since we couldn't meet and communicate frequently. And the fear of losing my only best friend kicked in. With time I felt that she ignored me, or maybe busy with her own stuff or maybe her priorities changed.A few months passed this way and my insecurities grew in multiples. And that's when I realized I was in love with her and couldn't let her go away. One night I decided to express my feelings to her, but she never gave a clear reply. I was her priority for sure. According to her, I was her best friend and my place in her life had not changed. But something changed for sure, she was no more the one she used to be with me. But I can't blame you for this.Being an introvert and having a best friend is a blessing. I too had a best friend but she isn't there anymore.So I thought it's better to remain an introvert. There are friends and then there is that one best friend who is etched into your soul and they will forever remain the same. I might still be her best friend but, she isn't the friend I used to have any more.
Dreams have a worldwide language of their own. Each man on the earth dreams for a certain time, every single night. Do your dreams mean something, do they have any connections with real-life prospects? Or are they simply a blend of your flight of fancy?
Mirror, Mirror on the wall. Who’s the fairest of them all?Fairy tale to Fiction logue, all have been a proof of experiential thoughts to which a human mind can exercise imagination and bring it to reality.Out of many such virtually realistic ideas, how humans perceive themselves to be is a whole stream of consciousness. Especially when it comes to the subject of personalities, history is evident of humans going to unparalleled stretches to satisfy a set paradigm of looks, intelligence and emotions. One of the most staunch realities of people trying to fit in the ‘convention’ that they set for themselves, exist in the track record of how people perceive the image of their Bodies. The most fascinating fact is that unlike in situations where the question is “how is my dress today?”, in body image issues, the questions change to, “how am I today?”. And there in minutes to change words and thoughts, they start doubting not the material but their existence and what they represent to the outer world. This in turn portrays how they think of themselves as this constant representation of the Self leads to a situation of mirror surroundings and influence how they feel about themselves.Body image consciousness is a phenomenon which occurs mostly when there becomes a certain concern extra concern for the individual outside than the individual inside. Over due course of time people have encountered numerous methods of tackling these issues. Sometimes they stem from the standards set by the society, sometimes they rise up out of self expectation. Few industries, majorly Fashion and the cinema industry, have seen individuals going to lengths to deal with body image issues and how they want to be perceived in this industry. Because of the rise of show biz, it became important for people to feel good, show good and take care of their bodies. The industry itself has putten up standards and stereotypes on beauty, talent and style. Through which the stars gaining up to fame and being in the eyes of a larger audience was integral to their performance. Many of these stars had influences in the public so much so, that they wanted to adopt their lifestyle and profess their style of living and thinking.Some well known artists and celebrities in the Indian cinema industries have adopted various ideologies and they have different perceptions on this issue and here are few examples.SRIDEVIEVERGREEN BEAUTYThe late actress was said to always be in her glorified young years even after surpassing her young adult age and contributing decades of marvellous works to the film industry. Sri Devi hammered claims saying that ladies more than 40 should take care of themselves and do what makes them attractive. In spite of the fact that her fans view her as an evergreen delight since her flicks like Naagin and Mr. India , the on-screen character has had an extremely nose job and botox besides the face-lifting and body-tucking surgery done. KAREENA KAPOOR KHAN THE CULTURE PULLS ME INThe performing artist, who brought the unattainable size zero fever in drift, has always been blessed with good looks and features. Even after following dietary restrictions and having strict workout regimes, Kapoor blames her Punjabi culture for being a foodie and her natural instinct towards north Indian delicacies.In an interview for a leading magazine she says, "I don’t know how the size-zero thing started—but I was only 27 and I wanted to do it for a role. It looked amazing, but that was then. I’ve been in the business for a long time since, and I’m more mature—now, it’s about being fit. I’m definitely comfortable in my skin right now” SHILPA SHETTYFIT IN FIFTYShe unquestionably is synonymous to wellness in our nation. After being Recognised as one of the top selling fitness freak actors, Shilpa with her faultless skin, slim midriff, idealize bends and thick hair make her a universal top choice. She claims that her idea of self fitness and hygiene is driven by the motivation of looking at her best at her 50.There have been many such perspectives from the other sides of the gender and industry spectrum, but these were few of the most influential ones. They set the trend for any new style by making it their own and producing a sense of aesthetic with it. Be it as a response to the media or social changes, One’s wellness should be the top priority, both physical and mental.In the end the question should be,Mirror on the wall, who’s the most themselves of them all?
Taking a little hiatus to their lives. We never forget what a mess we were at 16! A big group of friends or no friends at all, being a bully or getting bullied, a friendly person or an introvert who were never in love with their voice. Maybe? Faking smiles or laughing all day long, Dried eyes or dove eyes, racing with the wind at the speed of light, classmates who were irritating before, started residung in the hearts! trying to cover acne, carefree yet insecure about themselves, shot up hormones, distancing themselves from parents, intriguing or rather, questions at every step, looking at the world through a different lens. Undoubtedly, teenage life is the most confusing phase of one's life. How desperatelywe wished to relive those years and change them or live them again? That chapter of life, we all agree was no cake walk but surviving it and living it creating memories seems to be a victory in itself. It looks like a crucial step in the evolution of man which made us strong was this silly age. It seems to shape our present and that is quite a generalized statement. Isn't it?Teens question everything. Yes, even if they have google! It doesn't matter. They will always be in denial. They keep oscillating and floundering in their likes and dislikes. All in all, most of the Indian adults don't know how to bait their rebellious kids. They keep lecturing them which is usually right but the young ignited mind feels the anguish, hatred and obviously, the feeling of being misunderstood.It is okay, teens! you all are hastily running towards your dream, expecting a rise while nature awaits for your great fall!Yes, you will hit the wall just when you were expecting a door!Integrity without even getting noticed will turn you into a cruel satirist! wait for it! until your next fall which will again turn you into a humble person, or, maybe not? Rise- fall- Rise. We all learn from these years. Lots of Food and strange FolksRegular laughing at our own jokes. Fake friends, real friends, BFFs, bf, gf, mum, paa, and teacher with some funny nicknames. The depth of relations is measured by the length of the abbreviations. Validation of the outside world becomes supreme, often influencing your own decisions? Every day looks like the next moment of Insidious! Disappearing dreams, nightmares becoming reality perfectly blending with the virtual world. Basically, several old frames chuckling up to enter the world of transitions. MESS is one word and Embracing it becomes a necessity. You wish to pull the strings all along but instead gets pulled up by the world!?! Till then you figure out yourself, let me leave you wondering about HAPPY ADULTING!?!
Little things matter so let's try once and focus on it ❤
Depression is a mental illness which is suffered by all the age group people but mostly teenagers. In other words, depression is also known as sever sadness or sorrow a person suffers or sever unhappiness a person feels. Teenagers often lead to depression if they face rejections in life or are disappointed by some things in their life. Depression may lead to many other things. People think that they can never come out of depression but that’s not true. You can always overcome depression. If you are depressed it’s not your fault, if you are depressed it’s because you come across in a phase where you feel terribly sad or terribly disturbed because of something you lead to depression.Depression often leads people on a wrong path which they never wished off. At times its too late when nothing can be done and a wrong step is taken but it is never too late to try changing things and to begin something new. Teenagers are often depressed because of the mental pressure they have because of studies and the career they have to choose. At times being with wrong people and leading towards wrong doings lead teenager towards depression. Parental pressure also leads to sever depression. How you would question? I have an answer to it. Parents often force their children to choose a career as per their wish and will but not what the child wants. Also putting too much of pressure on the child for scoring well and for achieving good grades lead to teenagers facing mental depression if they do not come up to the expectation of their parents, they think they have disappointed them and could not to do what they parents wished. If you are a teenager and you have a unhealthy relationship with your partner and your relationship is and on and off thing it might lead one of the partners towards depression. If you are very attached to your partner and if your partner leaves you, you end up staying alone, reserving yourself, not eating, being sad and being in pain and sorrow and in the end, it leads to depression. And then depression leads to many other things like suicide, isolating yourself and many other things.Depression is more commonly found in woman then man. You lack of joyfulness and happiness and you have lost interest in things you really liked at a point of time. The causes of depression is never been fully understood because it is sometimes genetic, sometimes biological, sometimes psychological or environmental. As I mentioned it earlier depression is mostly found in teenagers or people who are in between of their teenage or adult hood. They get irritated very easily and are angry out of a sudden. At times it’s to difficult to handle because you never know what would happen next. It never too easy. As a parent it is very difficult to handle this kind of behaviour without knowing the reason why is it happening and what is the cause behind it. At that age teenagers often end up not talking to their parents as here is generation difference and thinking difference. But I really think as a eighteen year old that is really not a solution. You would end up doing some thing wrong if you do not share the problem with anyone. If you really start being depressed it would be really hard for you to over come it alone. No ne over comes depression alone because it is very hard. I have been at a phase where was depressed for six months after I lost my best friend because of cancer and it is true that you can never get over it alone. I went for counselling for almost six months to get over depression and it really helped and now I am here. Being in depression is never good because your mind would flow with negative thoughts and negatives things which you might do. You would not speak anything positive because all you would think is negative things and thoughts. Even if you try to think good you would not be able to because your mind would be blocked with negativity. As I have been there at a point of time it just becomes easier if you talk about it to someone close or to someone elder it might just help you and might make you feel a lot better. It is never too late for something but yes that is one of the solutions I personally suggest a teenager who is depressed or who is mentally disturbed. There are many ways to express yourself if you feel uncomfortable to talk to someone face to face write them up a letter about how you are and how you feel. That might help you and you would be comfortable to share your pain with another person and it might just do better to you. If you are a teenager and you are depressed and you are if you are reading this blog, share your problem or pain along with either of your parents who you are close to. If that does not work if you have a counselor in your school or college try talking to them once they might just you something better. If you require more help you can always approach doctors for further help. Depression is not something you should be scared of. Some times every second person is facing depression or has faced depression once in their life. It is never too easy to fight back with it. You do get weak at a certain point of time or you might just want to give up the fight but some day you would just win over it. It is just a fight you cannot do alone and you need someone who you trust enough to understands your problem and is ready to listen to you and help you to recover. It’s nothing bad in the end its just a phase everyone faces and you will be fine once you are over the phase.~By Saloni Maliwal
Mentally Challenged.My heart aches when I see them suffering because on one hand you are standing and living a normal life with a normal mental stability and on the other hand they who are scared to talk to you because they feel you would make fun of them or ill treat them.People who are mentally challenged face a lot of more difficulties in their life as compared to the normal people out there. People face a lot of problem understanding people who are mentally because at times they do not know what exactly they are talking about. There are ways to understand such people but at times they misuse the ways for wrong person. Being mentally challenged is not be abnormal but they are normal in a different way.In some places people who are mentally challenged are really treated in such a way that they have become a terrible problem in someone’s life. In some cases, the parents leave their own child in an orphanage because they are mentally challenged. Even if they have parents, they still feel that they do not have parents because they are left all alone in the orphanage without a family in spite of having one. I really feel disappointed at times when I hear or come across stories of people who are mentally challenged who are left alone because of their mental health, people mistreat them, molest them because they don’t know what is right and what is wrong. At times they really do not even understand the intentions of the opposite person and what they are going to do or behave like. But there are some people who really try to understand such people because they know it is very difficult for being a mentally challenged person and dealing with other problems along with the people who behave with them differently along with them. Some people try to communicate with such people so that they can make it easy for them to face life and deal with problems and some people just make it too difficult for the mentally challenged people to face their life. Some people aim to make their life easier and some just add more problems in their life. At times mentally challenged people feel left out as they are not treated the same way as normal or ordinary people are treated. As far as its about me I try my best to understand how the person feels and its my responsibility to treat them as I treat other children among them. I usually visit an orphanage before my birthday, it feels good to spend time with people who do not know you but are happy to see you and are happy to communicate with you. Back down the memory lane when I was in 10th I had visited the orphanage near by my house from my school for a social service, I came across not only children but also ladies and girls and boys of my age and older then me who were challenged in some or the other way. It is never too easy to see someone pain even if you do not know them. You feel terrible because you cannot help them in anyone and in the end there is only one way to help them is that give them love and make them happy and make them feel special and there is no other way because they find it difficult because they think we would laugh on them for being mentally challenged.~ By. Saloni Maliwal.
The concept of facing mental health problems and seeking help for them in India is highly tabooed. I have had a hard time processing this. In a diverse country like, differently able people, the LGBTQ and so on are not respected and sometimes even condemned. It is an irony in itself, isn't it? Some of the words people use are 'Cursed' or 'Paying for sins in their last birth'. I think mental health patients face a similar problem. People think you don't have a strong character the moment you mention your problem.Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is an important concept in psychology and sociology. The events that lead to the disorder are as follows:1. Stressor: directly experiencing a traumatic incident; second hand by police,counselors etc; learning that someone close has experienced trauma.2. Intrusion in memory: keep thinking about it; flashbacks and nightmares.3. Changes in attitude: nothing seems enjoyable anymore; eating too much or too less; feeling of isolation; lack of participation in activities; negative feelings about everything and everyone.4. Avoidance and Reactions:saying no to parties and getting together; irritated by little things; difficulty concentrating, difficulty sleeping at night; suicide attempts; panic attacks.If these symptoms persist for more than a month, it is PTSD and it needs treatment. The following events can cause trauma in an individual:Childhood issues; divorce and disputes in family; sexual assault or rape; witnessing death of loved ones- accident, suicide or war and so on.Many are not aware of the various treatments for people diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder. First and foremost, we need to be there for such and give them love and support when they facing such problems without overwhelming them with too much attention. Some of the treatments are listed below:1. Selective Serotonin Re uptake Inhibitors (SSRI)- induces positive thoughts, also called 'happy neuro-transmitters'.2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy- assistance provided by a mental health therapist to recover from trauma in a healthy and effective way.3. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)- relatively new psychotherapy treatment to alleviate the distress associated with traumatic memories.Information source:http://theoaktreatment.com Thank you for reading;) Have a nice day.
As young kids and teenagers, we all have had minor and as well as major crushes on our classmates, neighbours, etc. By the time we reach the age of 20 or 25, most of us have been in love at least once in our lives. We have imagined a romantic dinner date and a long term relationship with the person/s. Sometimes, the person we love eventually becomes the only aspect of our life that we actually care about due to which we tend to detach ourselves from regular social obligations. These result in a psychological phenomenon called ‘Obsessive love disorder’. The latter part of this article explains the causes, symptoms and treatments of this disorder.What characterises obsessive love disorder?If you want to be with the person who put you in an abusive relationship or rejected you, then you have the ‘Obsessive love disorder’. When one feels an overwhelming desire or a strong attraction towards a particular person to a degree that he/she becomes controlling and possessive and cannot accept any kind of failure or rejection.What gives rise to obsessive love disorder?The following mental health indicators can imply that the person may have obsessive love disorder:1. Disinhibited social engagement disorder: This means that every person who is extremely outgoing and socialising all the time with random people finds it hard to form meaningful and emotional one on one relationship and thus have obsessive love disorder.2. Reactive Attachment Disorder: It is a condition in which a child is unable to form a secure and loving bond with his/her primary caretakers that can be parents or guardians. Later on, they struggle to form relationships with anyone.3. Borderline Personality Disorder: It is a relatively common mental health disorder which is characterised by unstable mood swings and absurd behaviour. These people can have extreme reactions to situations, inability to control anger, addiction and suicidal thoughts. Some victims of this disorder face obsessive love disorder.4. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder: This is caused by obsessive fears that lead to compulsive rituals and practices in daily life. E.g.: the need to wash hands all the time. Due to the constant over one particular behaviour, the person may have obsessive love disorder.5. Relationship Obsessive Compulsive Disorder: This is the same as OCD but it implies the significance of the relationship. The patient becomes so obsessed with her partner that she talks about him all the time, stalks him, etc. Basically, every moment of her life depends on that person.6. Erotomania: This is a rather rare case but it means that you think a celebrity or someone of a really high profile is in love with you when he/she is actually not.Obsessive love disorder Symptoms:If you know anyone facing such problems, you must notify the following symptoms:1. Strong/Overwhelming Attraction: The person feels a strong desire to be with his/her partner all the time. These are the kind of people who say ‘I love you’ too quickly. They have high expected from the relationship sometimes believing false reciprocation of love from the other side.2. Need to Protect the Partner: You feel the constant need to protect your partner and fulfil all his/her wishes even when it is not required. You have a fear of losing the person. There is hardly any personal space left for both individuals.3. Need for validation: You need a constant reminder that you are loved and cared for by the person you are in love with. You call and message the person too many times a day to exhibit your feelings. This behaviour leads to low self-confidence.4. Low self-esteem: Similar to the previous point, this means that the person in the relationship does not feel like himself. Everything seems to fall apart. You start thinking that you are not worthy of being who you are and degrade your personality.5. Contact with Family and Friends: People with obsessive love disorder tend to have the least connection with family and friends. You find it difficult to maintain a healthy relationship with any person apart from the one you have feelings for.6. Unreasonable Jealousy: You cannot tolerate any other person who comes close to your partner or tries to talk to him/her. You stand the thought of another being with the person you love even if the intentions of the relationship aren’t bad.Obsessive love disorder Treatment:If you come across any patient of obsessive love disorder, do not assume the worst or isolate the person from your life. Instead, encourage him/her to visit a psychiatrist or a psychologist and seek professional help. Remind them constantly that they are loved and cared for. Spread awareness about mental health and its relevance in the contemporary world. There is no magical cure to obsessive love disorder but we can give useful advice and take help from people who trained in the field of psychotherapy to make the situation better.Bottom Line:We must make all our brothers and sisters aware of the importance of mental health and obsessive disorders. Let us help the people who have obsessive love disorder instead of stigmatising the very name of it.